It is important that married couples make time for each other. The hustle and bustle of life causes individuals to lose each other. Blogs need to be written, children need to be entertained and educated and each person still needs to manage to make time for themselves. With all of these obstacles and obligations, how can anyone have the mental, physical and emotional availability for the one they fell in love with?
Time is a fickle and flitting thing. If it is not properly managed and scheduled, time can run away on you. Yet, it is time spent with their spouse that is the foundation of their family. Aside from time allocated to God, time allocated between spouses is the single most important factor in a successful family life.
Here are some useful strategies and ideas I’ve found.
Time scheduling is an effective way to declare a time period off-limits for other activities. Calendar and planner entries carry weight to them. Events scheduled on Facebook, Google+ or even on a paper calendar will let everyone know that date night is taking place and that mom and dad are unavailable.
Money, What Money?
Date nights don’t have to be an expensive night on the town. Tanya came up with a great idea to create a special meal for our son and to have a separate special meal for just the two of us. We share the meal after Linus’s bedtime and that peace builds connection. From there we could play some games, or just talk. Sometimes a date night is simply having the intention to spend time together. It can even be chatting while cleaning and organizing. Hallie Lord’s website and book have a ton of great ideas. Resources aplenty can be found simply by searching for “at home date night ideas” on Google as well.
It’s Not About The Kids
Kids are a constant source of discussion for parents. Date night is a time for spouses to focus on each other. Discussions about child management should be gotten out of the way early so that more couple-focused conversation can take place. Date night should put the spouse at the center, not the children.
It’s Not About The Sex
Sex is a critical part of married life, however, the goal of date night not simply to “get to the fun part”. This is something that I still struggle with myself. Just cuddling on the couch can create a huge spark without anything else happening. Letting the other spouse dictate or lead the evening’s intimate activities is a good starting point. Perhaps going into an evening with the intent just to give a massage or cuddle could lead to something more.
Regardless of how it is done, it is extremely important for spouses to make time for each other. If other matters in life are “more important” than your spouse, what does that say to them? What does it say to the family?